Poll....What your name say about you?

The Men's Names – (scroll down for the women’s names)





Aaron - ugly but hung like a horse, prone to belly button fluff.


Able - totally useless.


Adam - not very bright and not very pretty, has almost mastered hygiene.


Adrian - usually short and very horny, watches cartoons.


Alan - shy but sensitive, gets screwed over by women.


Alex - cute and tall but a liar and a cheat.


Alistair - likes being tied up, and really enjoys playing with train sets


Amir - dirty, smelly, pecker is minuscule. Bad diet.


Andrew - Highly intelligent and wears a kilt. Poor standards of hygiene. Homicidal tendencies.


Antonio - has a great body and beautiful skin, and chicken brain. Looks in the mirror too much.


Anthony - great guy and kind to all girls, smells of wee.


Arnold - loser.


Arthur - hung like a slave and celibate.


Avenir - reads too many fantasy books, wears armour to bed.


Baron - Reads SAS books, wants to go out and shoot something or somebody.


Barry - lights fires, pinches girl’s bottoms and is well hung.


Barnaby - very big, very strong and very gentle, cries a lot.


Ben - funny and can be real difficult to beat at games.


Bill - thinks he's really popular, thinks all the girls want him ...he's wrong.


Bob - quiet and unpopular, eats with his hands.


Brad - short and squat, has bad breath.


Braden - Drop out and doesn't care, will set record for longest employee at McDonalds.


Brandon - good looking but uses girls. Not very academic.


Brendan - quiet and sweet, gets beaten up all the time.


Brett - worldwide **** and really insensitive, women love him.


Brian - mean and only thinks of himself, he's just a very naughty boy.


Bryan - sexy, but stupid - can't spell.


Bronsen - annoying and never grows up - has a stupid name.


Bruce - stinks bad and thinks everyone else's name is also Bruce.


Bryce - fun to be with and will make you laugh, you'll kill him within a week.


Callum - tall and geeky, very defensive.


Calvin - immature in a naive way, drives a Gemini.


Cameron - Australian. Big muscles.


Carl - horny. bastard, who can't sing.


Carlo - dark and brooding, for some unknown reason girls seem to like him!


Carson - fun to be around and really sensitive.


Chad - cute, sensitive and very studly - only found in American movies, no real person has that name.


Charles - can't trust him, eyes too close together.


Chris - can't pull, will pay for women, but has a huge pecker and can use it too.


Christian - Gay but very sexy and seductive.


Clark - hilarious and always in trouble, problem with 'jailbait'.


Cliff - very sweet and adores girls, but very superficial.


Clive - trainspotter ... dull as ditchwater.


Cole - nice, funny, and very stupid.


Colin - lies to women and blows up public buildings.


Cory - funny but ugly, ends up running fashion magazines.


Craig - tries to fit in - he never does.


Crispin - Ugly homosexual. Fancies himself. Successful


Curtis - needs constant mothering and reassurance.


Damien - spawn of the devil, but in a good way.


Damon - total loser in a sweaty sort of way.


Dan - quiet but funny, but becomes easily addicted to narcotics.


Danny - Wears stylish clothes and has silky womens underwear beneath them.


Dane - weird but can hold together a conversation with a mermaid.


Daniel - enjoys root vegetables in every orifice.


Darren - charming , but sleeps with men.


Darwyn - exercises too much, favourite word Ug Daryl - pompous and


overbearing, likes using big words that only he understands.


David - Sensible and works out a lot, loves girls named Florence.


Dave - extremely sexy, always funny, intelligent, stylish, trendsetter i.e. a wanker.


Dean - full of himself and thinks with his dick.


Dele - well endowed likes blondes. Looks in the mirror too much


Dennis - either very nice to girls or a ******.


Derek - has a great sense of humour, and a blow-up doll collection.


Dillon - Stupid but well-built, women just use him for sex.


Dominic - hilarious and will do anything to please anybody.


Don - ********, nobody likes him.


Doug - has a greasy face, drinking problem and farts.


Drew - bad-**** loser who never shuts up.


Duncan - hopeless ski bum, brains shot away long ago.


Dylan - thinks he's funny, falls asleep during sex.


Dwayne - cool guy to be around if you can handle his name.


Eddie - wants too many chicks he'll never get cos he's an ********.


Elis - would rather make model airoplanes than have sex.


Elliott - full of himself.


Eric - shy and timid like a little mouse.


Evan - a little slow but sweet, sexy, and a model mental patient.


Finn - Completely indecisive, suffers terribly with Catholic guilt.


Frank - single helix DNA and it shows.


Fraser - sucks pigs ***** %26amp; swallows the lot.


Frederick/Fred/Freddie - wants to rule the world. Loves women


Fritz - Loves playing games. Never wins.


Gareth - sweet but dresses too good to be straight. Can't play rugby.


Gary - drug addict but willing to share.


Garry - forever fiddling with himself and wonders why no-one will shake hands.


Gavin - likes bondage, S%26amp;M with other men.


Geoff - prefers golf to sex and war to peace.


George - barman who drinks more than he serves.


Gerry - quiet and insecure, a doormat.


Gilbert - Morris dancer, collects antique sweet wrappers.


Glen - the sweetest guy - really down to earth. good teacher. crap in bed.


Gordon - big bloke in a dirty raincoat, kinda flashy.


Greame - very hard to understand, likes group sex.


Graham/Graeme - will screw anything.


Grahame - thinks he's better than other Grahams because he has an extra 'e'.


Grant - Short and ugly! but so sweet and you can talk to him about anything.


Greg - really sweet and feels suicidally sorry for himself.


Harry - Good at sport. Women love him. Blokes hate him.


Harvey - cute, but addicted to sex and/or drugs.


Haydn - tries hard, succeds rarely.


Heinz - Likes variety in his life. in his fifties. Overweight.


Henry - dull, dull, dull, dull ... likes trains and tweed jackets, probably a science teacher.


Howard - likes small-breasted women and pornography.


Howell - sings too much.


Ian - likes to stuff animals and dress up in women's clothing.


Ivor - militant psychopath with homosexual tendencies.


Izzy - circumsized, but they threw away the wrong bit.


Jake - shy and sweet but a **** when drunk.


Jamie - Devious scum of the earth.


James - can't handle his beer, smells of mayonaise and does wet farts.


Jarrod - Arrogant, stuck-up, pompous and annoying. Loves himself totally


and has lots of mirrors.


Jason - Gayer than a pink fairy winning a trophy at the gayest pink fairy competition.


Jay - very sweet when you get to know him well. which is a problem because


he has bad breath.


Jeff - really ugly.


Jerome - gay, but very unhappy.


Jeremy - loud and thinks that he's all that he says he is.


Jesse - unpopular and needs to move on.


Jack - stupid but hot, always alright.


Jim - sweet, has fantasies of love and affection but wanks too much.


Jimmy - Goes to the toilet twice a night, doesn't always get up for it.


Joe - built like a bear, sexy but tends to lose his head. Bisexual


Joel - ****.


John - has few friends and no life - tends to kill small animals.


Jon - Not too bright will end up married to a cousin.


Jolyon - absolute raving homosexual.


Jonathon - think he's good - he's ****. Looks in the mirrror too much.


Jordan - sexy but weird in bed. Hung like a wildebeest.


Jose - hot boy with a love of hermaphrodites.


Josh - full of himself, fun. And has huge lips which resembles a ladies vagina.


Julian - used to be a wooden boy, but is now almost real with a big nose.


Junior - Not very clever, but good at football.


Justin - aggravating but lovable, insecure but successful and overweight.


Kain - one of the sexiest guys alive but very stuck up.


Keegan - always has a bit of his last meal displayed on his clothes.


Kev - lager lout, wears cheap and loud clothes.


Kevin - always attracts really fit girlfriends and then loses them when they see his dick!


Keith - good person to talk to when you have a problem - his is worse.


Kenneth - very, very...anything you want him to be.


Kerry - wants to be in a boy band but he's not pretty enough.


Kirk - good looking, worries that he might be gay.


Kurt - can kick anyone's ****.


Kyle - hornball who eats too many cornchips.


Larry - cute but wannabe player with big ****.


Laurey - short and funny looking.


Lee - girl dressed up as a boy, total **** bandit.


Levi - same as Lee only not so pretty.


Lewis - lonely, sad git, bit of a tosser. Welsh


Liam - loud mouthed ********.


Lorenzo - fine and dresses in stolen gold.


Lucas - fat loser that dates other men.


Luke - seems to be sweet.


Madison - so far up his own **** there's no room for his boyfriend.


Malcolm - tall man who tends to lose his trousers. And is gay!!!


Mark - Good looking and very clever. Every woman would if she could.


Marshall - Never seems to age, this is because he is in fact an anderoid!


Martin - Stud. Loves himself. would make a good lawyer.


Matt - the fat boy of the class, likes sweets and is full of ****.


Matty - Life and soul of the party, could get a corpse dancing.


Menno - built like a horse. Only does it doggy.


Michael - very good looking but he'll do anything for a girl. Doesn't like


to work too hard. Sexual deviant


Mick - always drunk, tendency for drug abuse.


Mintesh - boy racer, the ******** who drives with the stereo too loud and


the windows down even though it's cold!


Mitchell - big bloke, sweats a lot, usually pure alcohol.


Mohammed - small penis, but still really enjoys playing with it.


Nathan - stupid as hell, and tends to make others feel dumb.


Nick - inbred - can't get past the missionary position though.


Neil - sweet and will do anything in this world for you, great in bed but


only on his own.


Noel - only goes out with girls so that he can steal their clothes.


Oliver - likes men but is in denial.


Oscar - complete loser, hated by his parents.


Owen - cute gay guy who is immature, and sings Welsh songs.


Patrick - drunk, drunk, drunk.


Paul - cool, calm and handsome, a quality only found in gays.


Peter - Likes sheep more than girls, will probably end up married to a relative.


Phillip - homophobic, image conscious twat, likes to **** poodles.


Ramsey - thinks he's posh but is actually a knob.


Raymond - doesn't like to be called Ray because it sounds too 'straight'.


Richard - can't see his feet as balls are too big


Ricky - ugly shithead who everybody hates.


Rikki - see above, but can't even spell.


Rob - constantly watches porn.


Robin - Ugly and not very bright, probably a teacher.


Roger - acts like a wanker when drunk ... Permanently drunk!


Rory - men are only nice to him so they can talk to his sister.


Roy - total loser and computer genius.


Rupert - arrogant twat who is crap in bed but thinks he is a stud.


Russell - likes to play in the leaves which makes him an ********. Pantomime dame


Ryan - short and stout, but popular.


Sam - wannabe sex machine.


Sandeep - complete anorak, owns a metal detector.


Sean - thinks he's James Bond, in reality a dipstick.


Scott - has serious disabilities. likes winter sports


Sean - has small deformed testicles and no friends.


Seth - so sweet to other people but is a traitor.


Shane - cute gay guy who is immature, and sings Welsh songs.


Shannon - like the, river wet and full of ****.


Shaun - bit of a hard bastard, thinks women love him.


Simon - likes a night out with the lads and curries. Talks bollocks.


Sonny - thinks he's tough and proves it with young girls and boys.


Spencer - thinks everybody wants to shag him - he's a virgin


Steve - popular and funny when looked at side-on.


Stuart - loves it right up there, normally with a toilet roll and a hamster


Taylor - Gay, gay, gay, gay ....


Terry - small and wirey with a nasty temper.


Tim - hot but a bit strange, can never tell where he is.


Toby - best blow ever.


Tom - cool but can be very arrogant.


Tomas - part-druid, likes to dance round things naked.


Tony - hot, sweet, and totally fun to be around. tendency to megalomania


Travis - fat and horny with the best XXX collection to be found.


Trevor - sweet and funny but sometimes untrustworthy.


Troy - cute and popular.


Tyrone - Big bloke with a gay moustache, but nobody dares tell him.


Ty - small and kind of shrivelled.


Var - adventurous type, can't sit quietly and so is very annoying.


Wade - huge bloke, people jog round him and have to stop halfway for a rest.


Walter - Rich, but with no taste in anything, so the money is a bit of a waste.


Wasim - Good at sport. Likes bondage. Intelligent.


Warren - cool, homosexual guy. Picks his nose alot.


Wesley - great guy and easy to not notice.


Will - wishes he were popular.


William - not very tall, but ultra-cool.


Zach - sweet and polite and twisted.


Zahid - devious and sly. Not to be trusted.*





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The Women's Names





Abby - agony aunt, always willing to explain about your confused sexuallity.


Ada - blue haired, smells of wee.


Adie - quiet and shy, but when you get to know her .. quiet and shy.


Aileen - laughs like a demented dog. likes tic tacs.


Alana - pretty and popular, but with very dark secrets.


Alexandra - popular but very loud, sometimes forgets to bathe.


Alice - likes horses but looks like Kermit's girlfriend.


Alicia - pretty and knows it, watches herslf go by in shop windows.


Alison - bra and pants are the same garment, looks better with the light off.


Alyssa - wants to be 'exotic', but only manages to be 'strange'.


Amanda - I.Q. smaller than her bra size, a good shag, but she does practice a lot.


Amber - stereotypical exotic dancer, not too bright but very flexible.


Amy - Devious, Likes being on top, never stays the night - Not to be trusted. Likes any man not wearing trousers


Anastasia - overly-loud, wears clothes 2 sizes too small.


Andrea - Small breasts, small ****, drinks pints and plays a mean game of pool.


Andrina - dark and sultry, pretends she's a Russian spy.


Angela - Vain, Hair style more important than oxygen. Usually found hanging around toilets.


Anita - Beautiful girl with perfect hair and a body to die for.


Annabelle - Doesn't wear knickers.


Annette - She's BIG, like really BIG!!.


Anne - Looks like a horse, can't drive.


Anne-Marie - Gorgeous and with a great taste in blokes, has perfectly


formed breasts


Annie - Drinks too much, always wakes up next to ugly guys.


Ashlee - Dyslexic and spends all day thinking about sex.


Aurora - Beautiful and sexy, every mans dream, but sadly swings the other way.


Azaria - Beautiful and exotic with the brain power of an orchid.


Barbara - Shags like a rabbit, not fussy about appearance. Wears alot of make up


Bea - Beautiful, sexy, original, but nearly impossible to satisfy in bed.


Becky - one of the boys, knows about football and cars, unusually tall.


Belinda - Pleasing on the eye, usually has a couple of good points.


Beryl - Repressed alcoholic.


Beth - Empty headed, big breasted, and easy.


Bettina - Dominatrix.


Beverley - Trapped in an eighties time warp.


Bianca - Ginger. Big mouth.


Birgit - big scary woman, likes small blokes she can intimidate.


Bridgette - Eats pizzas all day, smokes cigars.


Britney - Falsely improved, no use to society.


Cait - Bow-legged country girl, really loves her horses.


Camilla - replaces the word 'yes' with 'ya'.


Cara - lazy girl, eats too much junk-food and yet doesn't get fat - annoying.


Carie - just like the movie, a scary freak.


Carina - Looks like the back of a bus, doesn't swallow.


Carla - Down to earth with good child-bearing hips.


Carly - Party animal until she gets too drunk to stand up.


Carol - Bubbly, life and soul of the party and the bedroom.


Caroline - Lard ****, shaves her ears, picks her nose and shops at oxfam.


Catherine - Attracted to the older man, needs ironing.


Celine - Emits hideous noises, waste of DNA.


Charlotte - Enjoys tea and cake, farts the national anthem.


Chaz - life and soul of the party, plays the piano and then strips to her own music.


Cheryl - Can fit hand in mouth, eats glass.


Chloe - Usually a weather-girl or a failed wannabe weather-girl.


Christine - Likes men in uniform, never warm.


Christina - Drop dead gorgeous and with a different bloke each night, well practiced.


Ciji - strange girl, sleeps with a vibrating teddy-bear.


Claire/Clare/Clair - Usually neurotic, gives good head but can have lesbian tendencies.


Courtney - Bit of a 'tomboy', rolls her own tampons.


Daisy - Virgin, works on a farm because she likes the way the tractor vibrates.


Danni - Should make nice threesome with sibling.


Davina - drug induced mental damage, should shave her neck.


Dawn - Gets up early, smells of chips.


Debra/Debby - Porn star.


Deborah - Bites the pillow, uses both hands.


Dee - Enormous mouth, gets a lot of work in porn movies.


DeeDee - cannot understand why no-one else masturbates in Ikea.


Denise - Sits on cats eyes, wears too much make up.


Di - Enjoys receiving oral sex, but doesn't like giving it.


Diana - Cuddly, which is a shame because she smells like cheese.


Diane - Enjoys company of animals. Deep as a puddle.


Donna - 70's throw back, likes cabbage.


Dorthe - smells of herrings, obsessed with over-sized sex toys.


Elaine - Rides side saddle, drinks meths. average breasts.. likes sharp edges.


Eleanor - Very posh, always washing her hands, but likes her sex dirty.


Elizabeth - Born to perform, hates chickens.


Ella - Fiery temper, but when she's not shouting she's as cute as a kitten.


Ellie - Far too attractive for the swear words that come out of her mouth.


Ellen - Could well have eaten all the pies.


Elma - Shy, easily dominated by men.


Elsa - Kind of old fashioned, but with beautiful big hair.


Emily - Wears odd socks, can have lesbian tendencies.


Emma - Gullible and easily swayed by a good looker!


Erminia - Small and graceful, slightly psychotic.


Estelle - Likes wombles, eats grass.


Esther - Plump with sagging breasts, normally heavily tattooed.


Eve - Shy timid creature until she has a drink, then she becomes very loud.


Evonne - Much happier now that the sex change operation was a success.


Faith - Legs meet at knees, can't shag standing up.


Faye - Wears wellies, can't swim.


Felicity - One of the boys .. except that she has the most enormous nipples.


Fern - Posh with a large mouth, can hold a conversation whilst giving head.


Fiona - Female mud wrestler, badly needs a shave.


Fiyza - Very sexy, she knows it and she flaunts it


Francess - A lovely lady even if she is as common as muck!


Frankie - Wears leather underwear, if it's quiet you can hear her buzzing.


Gabriel - An **** to die for but pads her bra with tissues.


Gail - Farts a lot, drinks Guinness.


Gayleen - Big tall woman who talks shite all day.


Gaynor - Wanna-be Lesbian who can't pull the girls.


Gemma - Talks too much, even during sex, even during oral sex!


Geraldine - Too posh for her own good, likes flying.


Gillian - Dyes her hair green, likes clubbing.


Gina - Eternal mother, eats nappies.


Glenda - Eats children, hates smoking.


Georgia - Loves her cakes, would rather have gateau than sex.


Georgina - Wants to be a man.


Grace - petite and pretty, ***** like a rabbit.


Grainne - Giggles excessively, sometimes wets herself.


Gwyneth - Blubs a lot, wees in the bath.


Hannah - Needs to be naked at all times, eats kebabs.


Harriet - Wears tweed and green wellies to the pub.


Hayley - Pretty, likes fast cars and slow men.


Heather - Shags like a freight train, bit of a screamer.


Helen - Hangs around with the wrong crowd, Kinky in bed, loves porn and is totally neurotic.


Helena - Likes to be in charge, wears a lot of black rubber.


Heidi - The hills are alive with the sound of music, likes gherkins, hates Nazis.


Hilary - Frigid.


Holly - Prickly to the touch, seasonal shagmeister.


Imogen - Drinks tequila from the bottle, wets the bed.


Ingrid - Right wing Nazi tendencies, never smiles.


Isobel - Motorbike gang leader, sells guns for pocket money.


Jackie - Heroin addict, sold her child.


Jade - I once had a Jade, but hasn't everybody??


Jalaine - Strange, introverted girl, secretly into plastic model aeroplanes.


Janet - Massive over bite, no neck.


Janette - She's hot and she knows it, a prick-teaser.


Janice - Loud and over-the-top, tends to talk with her hands.


Jarla - Kinda like a female Ali-G only not as funny.


Jasmin - Smells of sewers, eats the heads off rats.


Jean - hangs around with old blokes and let's them buy her stuff.


Jemma - Does anal, wears too much eye make-up.


Jenni - bone idle hence the tendency to shorten long words.


Jennifer - Huge breasts, should shave her legs more often.


Jessica - Always shags on the first date and sometimes even before it.


Joanne/a - Moans in her sleep, moans when she wakes up, can't cook.


Jo - Bisexual and proud of it.


Joelle - Lively, exciting, jolly and fun ... sometimes too much so!


Josephine - Likes to be tied up and teased.


Jody - Dresses like a boy and eats live frogs for breakfast.


Joyce - Never stops talking ... for God's sake shut up woman!


Judith - Big eyes, big ****, big problem with ballance.


Judy - Huge ****, married to a retard.


Julia - Innocent face, don't trust her, she'll steal your wallet in five minutes


Juliet - Eats too many chips, has greasy hair and a hairy ****.


Justine - Massive ****, likes hanging around men's toilets.


Julie - Likes outdoor sex, preferably with a chance of getting caught.


Kacie - cute and adorable, but prone to sulking.


Karen - Huge ****, shags like a rabbit.


Kate - kisses with her tongue and can hold a conversation whilst doing it.


Katherine - old-fashioned girl, giggles when anyone mentions naughty words.


Katy - Tom boy, likes her sex dirty, usually outdoors.


Katie - likes blokes and team sports, preferably both together.


Kayleigh - The Lara Croft of Essex, great in bed (practice makes perfect)


Keira - person most likely to start a cult, related to Starlin.


Kelly - smells of cheese, slobbers when kissing.


Kelley - not very bright, can't spell Kelly.


Kelsey - Very clever, wears glasses, boys scare her.


Kerran - tries to be mysterious, but everyone has been there.


Kerry - pretty, cute, and changes underwear once a week.


Kiersten - very sexy to look at, hard to please in bed.


Kimberley - wants to be a bloke, drinks like a bloke, farts like a bloke, wears a wig.


Kirsty - Eats live moles, can't dance.


Krista - Cool and pretty, tends to daydream all day and sleepwalk all night.


Kristy - Shy until she gets drunk, prone to spots.


Kristen - Emotionally stunted, thinks Robot-Wars is cruel and should be banned.


Kylie - Can't sing but who cares ... lovely ****.


Lana - Hated by her parents, accidental pregnancy.


Lara - Action packed, never seen naked.


Laura - Likes Max power magazine, can't drive. Dominatrix


Lauren – Pert breasts, seldom ventures out at night.


Leah - Likes outdoor sex, wees standing up.


Leanne - eats a lot of raw meat, most guys are scared of her.


Lena - Eats food then throws up, rapidly shrinking.


Leonie - Tall girl who likes short boys, it's a power thing.


Leslie - Likes bondage, hates men.


Leyla - Hot and horny, the girl that always will.


Lily - Makes a good friend, doesn't take crap from anyone.


Linda - Teenage bride can swallow oranges whole.


Lindsey - Likes doggy style, doesn't do housework.


Lisa - Will take all your money and run, gets turned on by porn.


Liz - Long legged and brainy.


Lizbeth - Sensible and serious, can talk without moving her lips.


Lorraine - Constantly whinges, will strip for a packet of jellybabies


Lorrie - Named after the vehicle she weighs the same as.


Louise/a - Likes to get around, fantastic breasts.


Luci - cute and loveable


Lucy - Strange dancer, wants to marry her dad.


Lynn - Funny and sexy, everything a bloke wants in a woman.


Lynnette - Has the attention span of a budgerigar, likes pretty things.


Madeline - Drives like a bloke, likes tractors.


Madusa - Really likes men, preferrably grilled with a side salad.


Maggie - Trainspotter, likes plaid.


Mairi - Quiet and shy but incredibly clever, secretly planning to take over the world.


Mandy - Cute and cuddly, thick as a short plank.


Margaret - Lovely mother, very generous.


Maria - Bangs like a barn door.


Marie - Life sapping dominatrix. Likes men to do DIY.


Marina - No get up and go, rusty underwear.


Marion - stuffs her bra with tissue, a bit cross-eyed.


Marolyn - Eats like a horse, out stays her welcome.


Martina - Ugly lesbian.


Martine - Can't act, can't sing, nice ****.


Mary - Likes men with long tongues and talented fingers.


Matilda - Likes dancing, mainly the waltz.


Mavis - seems nice until you notice the black cat, broomstick and pointed hat.


Meg - Cheesy smell, should be spelt with an S.


Meghan - Cold, hard-hearted *****, enjoys upsetting little children.


Melanie - Can hold 2 bar vacuum orally indefinitely.


Melinda - Trailer trash ... pretty, plump, and infected.


Melissa - Eats dogs, has been in prison 6 times for burglary.


Meryl - Dances like an ape, doesn't realise.


Michaela - Likes animals, should make a video with them.


Michelle - Wears white stilettos, dances round her handbag.


Marsha - Big butt, small brain.


Molly - Pretty and naive, would like to be slimmer, wears clothes with too many flowers.


Monica - Doesn't swallow, should have.


Nadine - Stunt Lady, can drink any bloke under the table! Don't mess with her.


Naomi - Wannabe diva, more of a diver.


Nancy - White hair, remembers tanners.


Narelle - Likes dressing up as a French maid but not French.


Natalie - Eats with her mouth open, farts the Nokia phone tune.


Natasha - Had seven kids before age 17, needs ironing.


Nell - Hasn't realised WWII has ended, lives in Kent.


Niamh - Quiet and cute, secretly wears mens under-wear.


Nicci - Pretty, blonde, nicely dressed and vacant.


Nichola - quiet, studious type, wears glasses, a tiger in bed.


Nicola - Slapper, alcoholic in denial.


Nicole - small sweet and with nice hair, should wear underwear more often.


Niki - wannabe mysterious spy but not bright enough.


Nina - Stuffs her bra with tissues, been single for years.


Nissa - speach impediment causes her to hiss, fond of reptiles.


Olga - You can park a bike in her **** crack, excessive facial hair.


Olive - usually accompanied by a couple of people in white coats.


Olivia - Gorgeous and knows it, has to sew herself into her trousers..


Olwyn - stupid name, welsh, just unlucky I guess.


Pamela - Gives amazing head, made of plastic.


Patricia - Obsessive about appearances, yet denies that she's shallow.


Pat - short and common, one of the lads and a bit of a laff.


Paula - Transvestite merchant banker from Basildon.


Peggy - Wears outdated clothes and will only do missionary position.


Penelope - Pitstop queen, likes her men to be stiff.


Peta - Rough and tough, seriously into bondage.


Phillippa - Forest forager, likes wild boar.


Phyliss - Thinks sex is dirty, always washing her hands.


Polly - nice girl with really bad dress-sense, fashion disaster, it's a shame.


Priscilla - likes painting with oils, Duckhams mainly.


Preya - can't cook or clean but good in bed.


Prudence - sensible girl, wears flat shoes, but will shag anything in trousers.


Rachel - Amazing gravity defying breasts, can grip a tenner in her arsecheeks.


Rebecca - Hairy armpits, orgasms without contact.


Rebekah - Not very bright, pretty, but sometimes forgets to bathe.


Renee - Huge breasts, but wishes blokes would notice her mind.


Romany - Wild and beautiful, swings both ways.


Rosalind - Upper-class lady but works as a secret agent when the government needs her.


Rose - Can be prickly, gives good head.


Rosemary - Very shy, nearly always seen with a bright red face.


Roz - Only enjoys sex when she's tied up and spanked first.


Rula - She measures up well.


Ruth - Has stretch marks around her mouth.


Sadie - Stand up if you're slim, please stand up.


Sally - Drives a Mustang, fights in pubs.


Samantha - Loves her brother, has 4 deformed children.


Sandra - Shags donkeys for fun, bow legged.


Sara - Air-head, with a gorgeous body to compensate.


Sarah - intelligent, funny and very talented when it comes to the naughty stuff.


Sarah-Jane - 'posh' girl, will screw anything in a BMW.


Sasha – Looks dreadful the morning after. Smokes cigars


Selina - Doesn't wear pants, heavy laundry bills.


Shannon - Beautiful, curvaceous, should be a model.


Sharon - The original ***** queen, uses everyone she meets.


Shauna - Lives in a trailer, has 16 kids each with a different surname.


Shelly - very cute, but a bit of a soft-hearted slapper.


Sheree - Cute, but very loud! desperately needs a volume control.


Shirley - Can swallow a Curly Whirly whole, likes bananas.


Shona - Librarian by day, exotic dancer by night.


Sinead - Wears big knickers and a vest, but is secretly very sexual.


Sian - Does mean sheep impression, hates mint sauce.


Silka - Appears shy, but secretly Miss Whiplash the dominatrix.


Silke - Only ever has sex outdoors near her favourite tree.


Simone - Used to be a shotputter from Cardiff.


Sonya – intelligent, funny and very talented when it comes to the naughty stuff.


Sophia - Beautiful girl with long legs, a shame her **** is the size of a small country.


Sophie - Brothel manager because she's too ugly to be a working girl.


Stacey - Likes cut off jeans and arseless Speedo's.


Steffi - Closet lesbian, maintains heterosexual relationship for effect.


Stella - reassuringly expensive, she's worth every penny!


Stephanie - Eats Muppets, wears Brogues.


Sue/Susanne - should shave more often, wears Denim aftershave. Very fertile.


Summer - wears flowers in her hair, a pretty dress, and no knickers.


Sylvia - loves the outdoors. Mad.


Tammy - Kind-hearted and generous, particularly in the bedroom.


Tanya/Tania - Hot minx, too short.


Tara - Upper class slapper, enjoys ranom chemicals.


Teresa - surprisingly small given the amount of alcohol she drinks.


Tina - Face like a smacked ****, should eat less.


Tori - Lives in a hedge, can't water ski.


Tracy - Easily swayed by alcohol. Mostly seen without underwear. Loves kittens.


Tracey - Lesbian.


Ursula - Likes puppies,usually in a hot curry.


Val - usually drunk, doesn't know where her knickers are.


Valerie - quaint and old-fashioned, someones aunt.


Vanessa - Beautiful, power-crazy *****.


Veronica - closet lesbian who sleeps around to prove she isn't!


Vicki - Likes Yoga. And Women.


Vikki - Drinks anything so long as it's got vodka in it.


Wendy - Possibly a man.


Zakia - Wants to be a spy when she grows up, but needs to wash more often.


Zoe - Talentless rock chick. Prepared to use sex as a weapon.














i forgot CONAN smart super cool,,irresistible





Daryle- ugly but hung like a horse, prone to belly button fluff.








cade------ gay, but very unhappy.


epdug-------good person to talk to when you have a problem - his is worse.


mikoy-----Funny and sexy, everything a bloke wants in a woman.


genie-----Likes Max power magazine, can't drive. Dominatrix








Nova--Beautiful, power-crazy








Colleen intelligent, funny and very talented when it comes to the naughty stuff.





Anjan Very shy, nearly always seen with a bright red face








Maren-Likes dancing, mainly the waltz.


Dalton -only goes out with girls so that he can steal their clothes.


Cory female -quiet, studious type, wears glasses, a tiger in bed


male Kelly .the fat boy of the class, likes sweets and is full of ***


Inga-Right wing Nazi tendencies, never smiles.

Poll....What your name say about you?
Jennifer - Huge breasts, should shave her legs more often.


Let's just say it's halfway right.
Reply:what about mariah


:) Report It

Reply:mariah- Huge breasts, but wishes blokes would notice her mind. Report It

Reply:aha i dont sew my self into my trousers! usually... Report It

Reply:Well Eddy would be close to Edgar and im sometimes call that, lol My sisters name is Aurora though and she would like that description ,lol.
Reply:ok, my real name is hendrick? but henry is close enough,., i think that is so true,., i love science








e=mc2
Reply:Mine says... stereotypical exotic dancer, not too bright but very flexible. Thats some funny stuff there... :D
Reply:Bullshite
Reply:my name isn't on the list, my middle name is though





Funny and sexy, everything a bloke wants in a woman
Reply:Awww,mines not up there...





What do you have for Morgen???








Marie - Life sapping dominatrix. Likes men to do DIY.


My middle name lmao
Reply:Well, mines 2/3 right....
Reply:My name is not on the list. My name is John Paul.
Reply:James - can't handle his beer, smells of mayonaise and does wet farts.





That's messed up, I so can handle my beer. =|





The other 2 are right. lmao
Reply:Stephanie - Eats Muppets, wears Brogues.





Those shoes are gayyy
Reply:ok thats cool
Reply:completely false about me lol
Reply:my name is not on the list.
Reply:I shall reserve comment until edited........








So much better...





You dream of me .... awwww, I'm flattered.


LOL